1. DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN’S PERSONAL ADS

40-ish……………………………………….. 49
Adventurous………………………………. Slept with everyone
Athletic……………………………………… No boobs
Average looking………………………….. Ugly
beautiful……………………………………… Pathalogical liar
Contagious smile………………………….. Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure……………………….. On medication
Feminist…………………………………….. Fat
Free Spirit………………………………….. Junkie
Friendship first…………………………….. Former slut
Fun…………………………………………… Annoying
New-Age…………………………………… Body hair in the wrong places
Old-fashioned……………………………… No BJs
Open-minded……………………………… Desperate
Outgoing…………………………………….. Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate………………………………….. Sloppy drunk
Professional………………………………… Bitch
Voluptuous…………………………………. Very Fat
Large frame………………………………… Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate…………………………. Stalker

2. WOMEN’S ENGLISH

Yes…………………………………………… No
No…………………………………………….. Yes
Maybe………………………………………… No
We need……………………………………… I want
I am sorry……………………………! …….. .. You’ll be sorry
We need to talk…………………………….. You’re in trouble
Sure, go ahead………………………………. You’d better not
Do what you want………………………….. You will pay for this later
I am not upset………………………………..Of course i am upset you moron!
You’re certainly attentive tonight………… Is sex all you ever think about

3. MENS ENGLISH

I am hungry…………………………………. I am hungry
I am sleepy……………………………………I am sleepy
I am tired…………………………………….. I am tired
Nice dress……………………………………. Nice cleavage
I love you……………………………………. Let’s have sex now
I am bored…………………………………….Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance?……………………. I’d like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime……………………. I’d like to have sex with you
Do you want to go to a movie?……………..I’d like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner?……………….I’d like to have sex with you
I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit………. I’m gay

Tags: Funny Stuff //